The Commitment
It has been a long time since I have posted in my blog or written a post about The Commitment. Pretty sure that I make every excuse not to keep up with a weekly blog, so it truly is my fault for this current state of frustration I am in. I have been praying and fasting with my local church for a 21 day fast. Today is day 14. I really forget the importance of fasting. It is not just about giving up Earthly things during the fast, but it is also about seeking a deeper level of faith to gain answers to the questions that we so often have.
I absolutely love my commitment with God and all of the blessings that I have received because of my own commitment journey. I just don’t always know how to share it in the right way. I believed from the bottom of my heart that writing about my journey would help so many others but it just seems impossible to reach a real and large audience. I often doubt my book and wonder if it is good enough. I know that I am not the best author / writer out there but I just can’t help thinking that God put this message on my heart for a reason. I was trying to fulfill what I thought was part of my plan by writing this book, but somehow it seems like a failure. I have spent time and money attempting to get assistance with social media; it didn’t lead to much success. I often wonder if I should keep up with my website and this blog. How do people create awareness about their “missions” in life? Maybe this is just the Devil trying to keep me silent so that more people won’t learn about the commitment.
These are things that I am going to continue to pray about during the fast. Maybe my vision of what the book should be and God’s vision are completely different. Maybe I am not on the same page with God at all. Maybe I am not trying hard enough. What could be getting in the way of spreading the message of the commitment? After all these years I’m not sure it will go farther than it is at this moment.
There is something that I am sure of, and that is that God is faithful. I know that he has a plan for my life; he has already proven that. During this fast I hope to get back on the same page with God even if it means hearing the word “no”, “not now”, or “this isn’t going to work.” What I do know is that anytime I have heard those exact words from the holy spirit it doesn’t mean that my journey is over. It just means that my journey has some unexpected turns around the corner. I plan to seek him diligently for the rest of this 21 day fast and listen to all that God wants me to know. I feel better getting this out. I am working on realizing that I am not perfect, never going to be perfect, and don’t need to hide the fact that I have fears and doubts as well. That is why I love God so much. He is perfect and has the perfect plan for each of us and I still believe that it comes through the commitment we share with him.
What are you believing God for?…….
To obey or not to obey…that is definitely the question. Let’s see what the commitment has to say about it.
Chapter 4: When your flesh is guiding you in a direction that God is telling you no then it is disobedience. That darn flesh can get you sometimes. When I entered into my commitment with God I will admit that there were moments of “flesh takeover.” Whether it was that I got frustrated with God or even wanted to test God’s faithfulness to me, I felt awful after disobeying him. There is something that grows inside of you when you are in the commitment with God.
I believe that we have to let that seed of growth direct us into the divine plan that God has. I remember when I was learning to be obedient it was much harder in the waiting phase. I was new in my faith and didn’t have a lot of answered prayers to back up this idea of staying obedient to God. I guess you could truly call that waiting and trusting the faith. I did however have a bible and a church that continued to pour into me the scripture that undeniably proclaims that Jesus has a plan for us. I like to refer to the scripture of when Jesus asked Peter to step out of the boat…sometimes I wish I was there to see it….
During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear. But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage!” It is I don’t be afraid.” “Lord if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” “Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out “Lord save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”
Matthew 14:25-31
I can remember many times when I was “sinking” from my own ideas. Even though I am not Peter it sure felt like I cried out to God for a hand every now and then. Obeying God meant going through the steps of day to day life but accepting and acting on the answers that he gave me in regards to everything. I continue to remind myself that obedience is a conscious decision that one must make every day. I hope you continue on this journey with me and learn more about your own commitment.
“Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.”
Philippians 4:5-6
This might be one of my favorite scriptures and parts of the commitment. It took me some time to realize that I can’t move forward in my commitment with God if I don’t pray about the things that are on my heart. There are two ways to pray. The first is to simply pray the desires and daily steps of your life to God. The second involves praying for others and intersessions that you feel are on your heart. The walk of prayer is so powerful and can lead to ultimate divine intervention and plans as it relates to the commitment. My biggest misconception was that my prayer had to be perfect. I always thought that God wouldn’t hear me if I din’t have adequate prayers. It took me having some frustrating moments of total surrender where I actually acted out my anger towards God, to realize that prayers are really a conversation of need that we can have with him. I always thought that prayer had to be so formal and I wonder if that might be why most people don’t pray or think that they don’t know how to pray.
“Learning about prayer can be challenging and frustrating. Learning how to pray is as simple as starting a conversation with God. Act as if you are having a talk with a friend. The more you practice the easier it will become and you will be able to pray the deep desires of your heart to God.” The Commitment – Chapter 3, page 34.
When was the last time that you had a conversation with God that involved questions about your life? Have you ever asked him what it is that he wants you to do? Who he wants you to be with? I have found that God loves a person who is open to hearing his voice and the only way to do that is to ask.
“Don’t be afraid to question God with the intention of understanding his plan for your life.” The Commitment – Chapter 3, page 35.
Don’t you wonder if God has something more and is just waiting for you to surrender and ask for his best for you?
There are a few things that I will claim to have learned through my commitment. The first is that God hears and answers prayers. The second is that even though it may take time to answer prayers God is always at work on our individual plans. And lastly, sometimes the answer might be “no” or it might be that there is something better for you. Often times when this happens, I have noticed that I have to let go of what I think I have to get from God what he truly means for my long term life plan.
“God is always working on your plan and there is never a moment when he stops. There will be moments when you feel like he has but just stand firm in your faith during those times. A silent God does not equal an absent God.” The Commitment – Chapter 3, page 36.
Find out more about The Commitment and God’s plan for you:
johannaandrews4tc.com
This might be my favorite chapter in The Commitment and one that has a very important part in the journey.
“Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10
It’s funny how I used to dislike this scripture mostly because I couldn’t figure it out. I think that most of those who know me would consider me a “type A” personality. I am always planning, need all the details before I decide on something, and usually have to talk about things multiple times before I feel like I have all the information I need to make decisions. Given that I was knew in my relationship with God this was very hard because I wasn’t used to praying and waiting. I found that two things had to happen for God to be my decision maker. The first was that I had to surrender what I was thinking and what I wanted to do on daily. The second was that I had to trust him no matter how hard it was. Through this process I saw results when I continued to stay faithful to being still, and not going with the logical decision but relying on the decision of the holy spirit and what the plan was.
Chapter 2: Giving God all the decision making power is very difficult. As humans we are taught to take control of every area of our life. He wants you to be still and wait for answers as he is a God who is always at work. I have many examples of how I allowed God to make the decisions and times where I didn’t. When it comes to matters of the heart it is always ten times harder to give him control. No one can close a door that God intends for you. Some times his doors will open for you easily and other times it will seem like an obstacle course. The point is, if the decision of “yes” belongs to you no one can interfere with the particular situation at hand.
“Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 19:21
While I was learning to allow God to guide my decisions I discovered a few more things. It is okay to have plans and certainly okay to believe that they will happen in a positive way. The key to those plans is to consult with God so that he can orchestrate the plans according to the individual plan he has for your life. I also learned that it got easier. It became much more clear to me how to surrender my thoughts and plans, and how to wait on him…….
As I reflect on the first chapter of the summer series I remind myself that surrendering doesn’t have an ending point. I think back to when I first entered into my own commitment and I thought “well, that was easy, now I just have to wait and see what God is going to do.” It took me a while to realize that every day is new and I would have to continue surrendering in order to stay in my own commitment. This seemed difficult early on. I got very discouraged because I have to admit that I thought it would be so easy. As I continued to progress in my faith I learned that God never said it would be easy.
What does easy really mean? I kept asking myself that question and what it really came down to was that I had to do the work. I had to take the steps to stay in my faith and keep the plan that God had for my life activated by putting him first everyday. God never gets to a point in our plan where we reach the finale. The plan is always at work and continuing to evolve as we evolve into better human beings who represent the kingdom here on earth. Once I trusted God more and grew in my faith it was much easier to surrender the big plans daily. As we lead into talking about the next steps we will discover in Chapter 2 how to continue on in this process.
“In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly.”
Psalm 5:3
Yes mornings are busy, yes I have kids, and yes sometimes I forget too. Just like a good friendship it is quality not quantity. God enjoys hearing from us when we take a moment to get into the Holy Spirit. It doesn’t have to be long we just need to be present so that God will hear us and answer us…..
“For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord.” “Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”
Jeremiah 29:11-14
It was in a moment of realizing that everything I was doing was failing me that I discovered God had a different plan. Had I known this sooner maybe I wouldn’t have gotten to the point where I had not other choice, so it seemed. At the time it felt horrible but looking back it was a good place to be because I was willing to allow God to direct my life. I knew that the Holy spirit was near me and reaching for me I just didn’t know how to access it until I surrendered. It began in phases but there was a pivotal moment that I will always refer to as a beginning point of clarification.
Chapter 1: The Surrender:
It all stared with a dream one that led me to the Lord. It continued with a church when the Lord said, “go there.” From that point I found a heart. My heart, one that desires to share with you what I had to figure out on my own. Our journeys won’t be the same, but out God is identical. He wants for you the same things he wanted for me. Sharing God, my personal stories, and my faith will all help you to enter into the most important commitment of your life, you and God. Read this book with an open mind knowing that once you are done with it your decision to follow it will be up to you and God.
When I surrendered it was such a feeling of elevation. I though to myself that now I could just sit back and let God do all the work. What I found out was that in order to activate my plan I had to stay plugged in and working on my faith through the word of God. I couldn’t just let go and do nothing. I had to begin working on myself so that God could allow me access to this plan knowing that he already loved me exactly where I was. This was not an easy concept to understand and it is something that I still work on daily. Given the state of my life in all ways, I knew that I had a choice to make. I could continue directing my steps with no faith and remind myself that it wasn’t leading to what we all deserve which is love and prosperity, or, I could allow God to direct my path and plug into my commitment. I chose Him……
Find out more and read into Chapter one by going to my website to view or purchase the book:
johannaandrews4tc.com
Throughout my journey with God He has shown me that his faithfulness comes in the most unusual ways but always works out for the best. I have been thinking a lot about writing a new blog, and wanted it to be truly unique so that it’s message could be unusual in a way that glorifies God. I have found the perfect circumstance to fit that desire.
My daughter is a little over three years old. When she was born I felt like time stood still. We locked eyes in a special way and I knew that she had an angel presence about her. She was beautiful, alert, and quiet in such a gentle way that it took my breath away. I admired her from the beginning and had a knowing that she would be better then me. I want her to be. I want her to become the woman that I am still striving to be. With each moment that passed since her birth she left me amazed with her presence. It was like she just “got it” from the very beginning. Everything was easy with her. I could go anywhere and do anything and she just knew the right way to be, act, and interact along the way. It was hard to believe this was only three weeks into her sweet life on earth. Around the one month mark I began to notice that she was coughing and making funny noises. I took her to the doctor but because it was the weekend, it was a doctor she doesn’t normally see. He didn’t perform any tests and tried to tell me that she had “physiological reflux”. I went home frustrated and did some research. I couldn’t find anything on this whatsoever. A day passed and then another while she declined. I called Lynsie to talk but ended up getting some good Mom advice. As a nurse, Lynsie listened to me and suggested strongly that I call back. I did and that was the moment that saved my daughter the first time.
I took her to her regular doctor and he quickly noticed her symptoms and diagnosed her with RSV. I had heard this term but didn’t really know what it was all about. He informed me that it would involve further treatment. I felt some guilty relief in that moment thinking “great, let’s get some antibiotics and get her better.” He informed me that she would be going to the hospital for “supportive care.” So I drove her to the hospital and spent a grueling 32 hours with her. She was easy and compliant, it was watching her getting poked, suctioned, and throw up multiple times that took it’s toll on the both of us. I realized that my “perfect” daughter already had a big bump in the road. I think in that moment I still felt like it wasn’t a big deal but secretly was very concerned. She improved dramatically and we went home. No one prepared me for what was to come. I learned that babies who have RSV can be diagnosed with asthma. What followed was months of coughing, wheezing, sleepless nights for all, and panic as a Mom who wanted her daughter to recover. I realize that this is minor compared to what other children and people go through. I also have learned that pain is pain and it still hurts no matter what the situation may be. I have been to the doctor with her more times then in my entire life without her. She has had what seems like every test and organ checked out before the age of two that I couldn’t think of what could possibly be left undone medically at that point. I panicked, had anxiety, cried, and was feeling concerned that this simple nightmare would never end. Yes, the sleepless nights got to me but not because I couldn’t manage, but because I couldn’t stand to watch her suffer night after night. I began to do what I know works beyond all human intervention. I began to pray.
I didn’t get demanding or unfaithful with my prayers but I just began to ask for a healing in God’s timing. One of the things that I have learned is that God is going to do whatever He wants according to his will, so I began to ask that if she is going to have asthma that it be easy and manageable for her. I began to accept this as her new normal. I made some diet changes for her and started to see some improvement. Summer is here is always the easy season for her. As she continued on not really getting worse but not really getting better, I began to decline. I have always struggled with allergies but as I have aged it has gotten worse. I began going to an allergist and discovered I am allergic to what feels like just about everything. I have an allergy to some foods, environment, and even pet allergies I was unaware of. It seemed like at this point my daughter and I were both struggling. My prayers began to change as I realized from speaking with my doctor that it was possible my condition could get worse. I began doing allergy shots only to find out after a year I have had even more symptoms. I never really prayed about my situation because I have been concerned about my daughter since basically her birth. One night I was praying and thinking about accepting her circumstance asking God to help me accept this for her if this was his will when he spoke to me. The holy spirit was clear in saying “She’s growing out of it but you are growing into it.” At first I was bummed but I was so quick to respond and say “give it to me.” “If it means that she can heal, I will take it, all of it.” I felt peace and understanding with that prayer. I felt that I was heard and that God would do something.
Just a few days ago I went to the allergist for my annual appointment to follow up and report my symptoms. I have been struggling to breath and it has become more apparent to me that something has changed. After talking with me and completing his exam, he informed me that I officially have asthma. Of course at this point I was a little sad and frustrated. As I came home and let it sink; in two things came to my mind. The first was if this is the worst thing I have to deal with at this moment that I am doing okay. The second thing was a sweet reminder from the Holy Spirit about God’s plan. I was quickly reminded that I was “growing into it” as I had discovered in my prayers. I felt some relief because in that moment all I remembered was that “she is growing out of it.” I could only think about my sweet daughter who deserves the best. I realized that it was a reminder of the transformation God would make in her life. I have always known that God works in mysterious ways but this situation proved that his plan is unique and that He keeps his promises. I felt so passionate about sharing this because it really shows that God will do what we ask of him even if it means a sacrifice. I am excited that I have to look forward to my daughter having a complete healing. I also know that God will give me the resources to manage my own symptoms. I feel so confident with such a simple medical issue that God will help me to overcome this in whatever way that I can. I know that it is much easier as an adult to deal with this then it would ever be for my daughter.
I share this because I think it is important to remember that we serve a God who is faithful and will commit to us as long as we commit to him. We also serve a God that heals and provides the means to heal even the hardest of circumstances. It reminded me that I might need to sacrifice for the will of God but that He will continue to protect me and my daughter with only the best intentions. Being in the commitment with God means sacrificing, but it also means receiving blessings beyond measure. I have learned that when the Holy Spirit speaks, it is the God given truth and is not to be taken lightly. God has the final say in everything so we don’t have to be afraid with what He hands us.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and He will make your path straight.” Proverbs: 3-5
www.johannaandrews4tc.com
AS I think about God’s calling on a person’s life I think of one movie in particular. For those of you who have small children you know what I am talking about. That one movie that your son or daughter gets hooked on and will only watch that one movie for a year straight! For my daughter that movie has been Moana. She loves Moana. I have become a fan of that movie mostly because of the music. I love the music and scenery and it has always drawn me in while she is watching it. After seeing it for what felt like the 100th time, I actually picked up on something more meaningful.
In the movie, Moana is pre determined by her family to run her small island village. From the moment that she is a little girl it seems that this is hard for her to accept. Not because she doesn’t like her people or her village but because something more powerful is brewing. She is fascinated with the ocean and is drawn to it every moment she has by herself to think about her life. She tries to ignore it because her father says its dangerous but she can’t escape it. Finally, she gives in and sails off on a voyage to save her people. She starts off with challenges and even gives up at one point insisting that the ocean choose someone else for this mission. Ultimately, she ends up finding the strength to carry on and believe in herself and achieves the goal of saving her people.
As I watched the movie it caused me to relate this to the calling that God has placed on each of our lives. I can easily relate to moments of doubting and wanting to give up, but I can also relate to that feeling that no matter how hard you try to get away from the calling (something quick and easier comes along) you cannot escape the divine plan that God has for your life. Watching Moana makes me realize that I don’t want to escape it. I would rather press on and continue following His directions so that I can have an opportunity at true God given happiness.
Moana causes me to reflect on what I should be doing while waiting for the calling of things to come. She doesn’t really know how to sail but she begins preparing for it. She practices and doesn’t give up and finally she is able to sail. Are we preparing while we are waiting for the calling to come together? This is something personally I really need to work on. Am I treating people right? Am I setting a good example as a wife, mother, adult, or even friend? God is a reminder that if we draw near to him he draws near to us. As I continue to go through the phases of life, I have realized that there is more then one calling that God has planned for me. What I am doing in one time period I may not be doing in another time period, yet both were part of the calling.
Watching that movie for what seemed like hundreds of times made me realize that I should always prepare for the plans that God has for me. Maybe being ready determines when God will reveal the next steps in my life. Are you ready? Have you ever thought that you knew what your calling was but maybe you weren’t sure if you could do it? Maybe there are things that you would have to sacrifice in order to live out your calling. Just like Moana, I believe we cannot escape our calling. The closer we are to God the more he trusts us and gives us more responsibility related to our individual plan. That is one of the many things I love about The Commitment. The steps in the Commitment are exactly what you need to get closer to all that God has for you. Even though it’s just a movie, Moana made me realize that we can conquer our calling with practice, faithfulness, and perseverance. I’m going to continue to prepare.
www.johannaandrews4tc.com
There are many storms of life but a new fear arose in the Andrews household when the weather report called for a catastrophic hurricane. I have been through two other hurricanes on the East Coast of Florida but my husband has never had the experience of the before and after affects of a hurricane. Her name was Irma. She gave her notice to the world at least a week and a half before confirming that she was heading directly for our state of Florida.
Usually in our marriage I am the one who worries about most things. Chris is always the level headed one who continues to remind me that things are always going to be okay. Not this time. There was fear, worry, and skepticism that our household would remain unscathed from such a terrible event. I found myself drawing on my tiny faith yet again to help stabilize the emotions going on in our home. Fortunately with small children they will have little to no memory of the events that occurred.
I remember talking with Chris and reassuring him that everything would be okay. We discussed our plans, our house, when we would leave and how we would prepare. Emotions were high and even I was scared. So I went to my bible and found one of my favorite verses that is becoming a theme for our family.
“Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” Matthew 17:20
I began praying and asking for God’s protection. Chris was scared, concerned, and not sure what to expect. Our conversation went from the factual details about the storm to making sure that we have the faith to know that God will protect us and pull us through this if we rely on him. It taught me that we can’t just assume we have God’s protection but that we must seek him and ask for his protection. Of course he loves us all but his power and protection are activated the more we seek him and follow his plan.
So we prepared and watched for the storm as the week approached. As we continued to watch the news it became clear it was heading right for us. I felt God confirming that yes we should evacuate and leave, but I also felt a peace that he would keep his promise of protection for our family and our home. I don’t think Chris was feeling the same. For the first time in a while I realized that I have to be the strong one who continues to remind both of us that God is going to protect us. I remember riding out the storm overnight in central Florida with our kids asleep in the bedroom. I stared at the ceiling the whole night and a few times shot up in bed wondering if I should wake the kids and take shelter. During that time I prayed and talked to God. It’s funny how there are key moments in my life where I knew without a doubt that everything would be ok. This was one of those moments. Even after the storm was over and it was morning, I found my husband still quite emotional and concerned.
I continued to draw on the scripture from Matthew and remind him that we must have faith. It doesn’t take a lot of faith it just takes a person who is not going to give up on that tiny faith, in order for the miracles of God’s protection to be clear. After the storm was over we headed home the next day. As we entered our neighborhood it didn’t look bad at first glance until we continued down the flooded streets. We made it to our home and sure enough it was unharmed. This was a miracle considering the main sliding glass doors in the back of the house did not have their shutters on. We were unable to get those shutters on and even I was having doubts that they would withstand the winds. As we entered and noticed everything was in it’s place, I reminded myself that tiny faith goes a long way.
Even though the recovery efforts took a while and we had to leave the home again with our children, we made it through the storm. The storms in our life are not always something we watch on the weather report but rather events that might cause catastrophic destruction if we are outside the will and plan of God. I am continuing to learn that keeping God at the center of each storm is truly the way to live with a full heart and divine order of protection over whatever this life of ours will bring. When you face your storms you have a chance to rely on tiny faith from a big God who knows the beginning and end of all our encounters. For the Andrews house we are going to work on praising him not just when the storms hit but when things are quiet and calm as well. God is always wanting us to conform to his plan and it is so much easier to accept the changes and valleys when we rely on that tiny faith.
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish it’s work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
1 James: 2-4
I can remember in the early stages of my commitment thinking to myself and questioning God as to why the test felt impossible. There were many reasons for this. At times it was because I truly had a hard time believing his promises. Other times it was because I went in and out of the full commitment holding on to “strings of the flesh” that I thought I needed. It was also the enemy (Satan) continuing to pump my mind full of lies that would keep me at bay and allow me to not completely surrender. Perseverance at times felt like the enemy because it was hard. Come to find out that perseverance was the only thing that keep me linked to the commitment.
As I matured in my own relationship with God I realized that anything that came easy was typically the work of my own flesh or the enemy. The enemy always wants us to take the easy way out. He requires very little work and very short term satisfaction. It wasn’t until I grew in my faith that I realized that God had a permanency to his plan. He was not interested in the feelings that I would acquire in a day, but rather the feelings that I would adopt over a lifetime. God is only interested in the choices that we make which have an eternal impact.
I bring this up because it is so important for me to remind myself that when I persevere, I have conquered my flesh and all that goes with it. This builds strength and strength builds a deeper relationship with God. I love this scripture and the great reminder that when we conquer life with God, we lack very little. I am so grateful for the times when it seemed impossible to move forward and keep believing. Without those hard times, my commitment would be shallow and filled with fleshly desires that didn’t build character or provide happiness.
When I think of perseverance with God, I think of joy. I love moving into a deeper level of commitment with God; to the point that I can rest in the trial and know that God is going to help me through it as long as I stay faithful. I love the commitment and everything that it stands for. I love our God who presents this opportunity to us that can be life changing. I can hardly remember the empty feelings of the flesh that I had before the commitment. The commitment has built in me a heart that has depth and is free from pain.
Take some time to pray and discover your commitment. Our journeys won’t be the same but our God is identical…..